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Monday, 10 March 2014

Dont be Judgmental – Story



One old man was sitting with his 25 years old son in the train. Train is about to leave the station. All passengers are settling down their seat. As train started young man was filled with lot of joy and curiosity. He was sitting on the window side.

He went out one hand and feeling the passing air. He shouted, “Papa see all trees are going behind”. Old man smile and admired son feelings.


Beside the young man one couple was sitting and listing all the conversion between father and son. They were little awkward with the attitude of 25 years old man behaving like a small child.

Suddenly young man again shouted, “Papa see the pond and animals. Clouds are moving with train”. Couple was watching the young man in embarrassingly.

Now its start raining and some of water drops touches the young man’s hand. He filled with joy and he closed the eyes.
He shouted again, “Papa it’s raining, water is touching me, see papa”.

Couple couldn’t help themselves and ask the old man.
“Why don’t you visit the Doctor and get treatment for your son.”
Old man said,
“Yes, We are coming from the hospital as Today only my son got his eye sight for first time in his life”.
Moral: “Don’t draw conclusions until you know all the facts”.

STORY -- WHY WOMEN CRY


A little boy asked his mother, "Why are you crying?"

"Because I need to" she said.

"I don't understand," he said.

His Mom just hugged him and said, "And you never will."

Later the little boy asked his father, "Why does mother seem to cry for no reason?"

"All women cry for no reason," his dad answered carelessly.

The little boy, still wondering why women cry, finally asked the old wise shaikh (scholar). "He surely knows the answer", he thought. "Ya Shaikh! Why do women cry so easily?"

The Shaikh answered: "When Allah made the woman she had to be made so special. He made her shoulders strong enough to carry the weight of the world, yet gentle enough to give comfort.

 He gave her an inner strength to endure childbirth and the rejection that comes from her children.
 He gave her a hardness that allows her to keep going when everyone else gives up, and take care of her family through sickness and fatigue without complaining.

 He gave her the sensitivity to love her children under any and all circumstances, even when her child hurts her very badly.

 He gave her strength to carry her husband through his faults and fashioned her from his rib to protect his heart.

 He gave her wisdom to know that a good husband never hurts his wife, but sometimes tests her strengths and her resolve to stand beside him unfalteringly. And lastly, He gave her a tear.

 This is hers and only hers exclusively to use whenever she needs it. She needs no reason, no explanation, its hers."

"You see my son, the beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears, the beauty of her face, or the way she combs her hair.

The beauty of a woman must be seen in her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart - the place where love resides."

The little boy got the answer and never asked the question again.

? [ DON,T FORGET TO SHARE ] ?

Lawyer Married Divorced Women




A lawyer married a woman who had previously divorced ten husbands.

On their wedding night, she told her new husband, “Please be gentle, I’m still a virgin.”

“What?” said the puzzled groom.

“How can that be if you’ve been married ten times?”

“Well, Husband #1 was a sales representative, he kept telling me how great it was going to be.

Husband #2 was in software services, he was never really sure how it was supposed to function, but he said he’d look into it and get back to me.

Husband #3 was from field services, he said everything checked out diagnostically but he just couldn’t get the system up.

Husband #4 was in telemarketing, even though he knew he had the order, he didn’t know when he would be able to deliver.

Husband #5 was an engineer, he understood the basic process but wanted three years to research, implement, and design a new state-of-the-art method.

Husband #6 was from finance and administration, he thought he knew how, but he wasn’t sure whether it was his job or not.

Husband #7 was in marketing, although he had a nice product, he was never sure how to position it.

Husband #8 was a psychologist, all he ever did was talk about it.

Husband #9 was a gynecologist, all he did was look at it.

Husband #10 was a stamp collector, all he ever did was… God! I miss him! But now that I’ve married you, I’m really excited!”

“Good,” said the new husband, “but, why?”

“You’re a lawyer. This time I know I’m gonna get screwed!”

Uncle Bob and little Girl



Uncle Bob and little Girl

It’s Saturday morning and Bob’s just about to set off on a round of golf, when he realizes that he forgot to tell his wife that the guy who fixes the washing machine is coming around at noon. So Bob heads back to the clubhouse and phones home.

“Hello?” says a little girl’s voice.

“Hi, honey, it’s Daddy,” says Bob. “Is Mommy near the phone?”

“No, Daddy. She’s upstairs in the bedroom with Uncle Frank.”

After a brief pause, Bob says, “But you haven’t got an Uncle Frank, honey!”

“Yes, I do, and he’s upstairs in the bedroom with Mommy!”

“Okay, then. Here’s what I want you do. Put down the phone, run upstairs and knock on the bedroom door and shout in to Mommy and Uncle Frank that my car’s just pulled up outside the house.”

“Okay, Daddy!” A few minutes later, the little girl comes back to the phone. “Well, I did what you said, Daddy.”

“And what happened?”

“Well, Mommy jumped out of bed with no clothes on and ran around screaming, then she tripped over the rug and went out the front window and now she’s all dead.”

“Oh, my God! What about Uncle Frank?”

“He jumped out of bed with no clothes on too, and he was all scared and he jumped out the back window into the swimming pool. But he must have forgot that last week you took out all the water to clean it, so he hit the bottom of the swimming pool and now he’s dead too.”

There is a long pause.

“Swimming pool? Is this 8*4-7*3*?”

Sunday, 9 March 2014

Five Lessons of Life – Funny and Worth Reading




Lesson 1:
A sales rep, an administration clerk, and the manager are walking to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it and a Genie comes out. The Genie says, “I’ll give each of you just one wish” “Me first! Me first!” says the administration clerk. “I want to be in the Bahamas, driving a speedboat, without a care in the world.” Poof! She’s gone. “Me next! Me next!” says the sales rep. “I want to be in Hawaii,relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply of Pina Coladas and the love of my life.” Poof! He’s gone. “OK, you’re up,” the Genie says to the manager. The manager says, “I want those two back in the office after lunch.”

Moral of the story: Always let your boss have the first say.


Lesson 2:
A priest offered a lift to a Nun. She got in and crossed her legs, forcing her gown to reveal a leg. The priest nearly had an accident. After controlling the car, he stealthily slid his hand up her leg. The nun said,”Father, remember Psalm 129?” The priest removed his hand. But,changing gears, he let his hand slide up her leg again. The nun once again said, “Father, remember Psalm 129?” The priest apologized “Sorry sister but the flesh is weak.” Arriving at the convent, the nun went on her way. On his arrival at the church, the priest rushed to look up Psalm 129. It said, “Go forth and seek, further up, you will find glory.”

Moral of the story: If you are not well informed in your job, you might miss a great opportunity.

Lesson 3:
A crow was sitting on a tree, doing nothing all day. A rabbit asked him,”Can I also sit like you and do nothing all day long?” The crow answered: “Sure, why not.” So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the crow, and rested.

…A fox jumped on the rabbit and ate it.

Moral of the story: To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very high up.

Lesson 4: Power of Charisma
A turkey was chatting with a bull “I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree,” sighed the turkey, but I haven’t got the energy.” “Well, why don’t you nibble on my droppings?” replied the bull. “They’re packed with nutrients.” The turkey pecked at a lump of dung and found that it gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree. The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch. Finally after a fourth night, there he was proudly perched at the top of the tree. Soon he was spotted by a farmer, who shot the turkey out of the tree.

Moral of the story: Bullshit might get you to the top, but it wont keep you there.

Lesson 5:
A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold the bird froze and fell to the ground into a large field. While he was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on him. As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, he began to realize how warm he was. The dung was actually thawing him out! He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy. A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him.

Moral of the story:
1. Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy
2. Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend
3. And when you’re in deep shit, it’s best to keep your mouth shut !

10 Rules for Succesful Life





Golden rules for successful life

1- Be honest when in poverty.

2- Be simple when in wealth.

3- Be polite when in authority.

4- Be silent when in anger.

5- Get along with the rich, the poor, the beautiful, and the ugly.

6- Treasure every moment with your loved ones.

7- Have a positive mindset.

8- Remember things that you are grateful for.

9- Don’t settle for being a copy.

10- Pay attention to the right things. 

Newlywed Marriage Advice



Three couples got married and spent their honeymoons at the same hotel, where they were all attended to by Jeff the Bellboy.

The first man married a nurse.
Jeff showed them to their room, all the while thinking to himself, “Lucky guy! Nurses are known to be hot to trot.”

The second man married a telephone operator.
Jeff showed them to their room, while thinking to himself, “Wow, he’s one lucky dude. Telephone operators have such sexy voices and once you pop that top button.. Va-voom.”

The third man married a school teacher.
Jeff showed them to their room and thought to himself, “Poor sap. She may be pretty, but teachers are way too frigid.”

.
.
.

At 5:30 the following morning, Jeff reported to work. He expected the teacher’s husband to call for breakfast any minute, but was sure the other two wouldn’t call until much later in the day.

The phone rang at 6 a.m. and it was the nurse’s husband wanting breakfast.

Jeff took breakfast up to the room and when the husband opened the door, Jeff stepped back in shock. The man’s pajamas were still pressed and his hair nicely combed.

“Sir, what happened?” asked Jeff. “You married a nurse.”

“Son, don’t ever marry a nurse,” the man sourly replied. “All I heard last night was her nagging voice saying, ‘You’re not sanitary, you’re not sanitary’.”

.
.
.

The phone rang again at 6:30 a.m. and this time it was the telephone operator’s husband calling for breakfast. Jeff took it to the room as quickly as possible. When the man opened the door, Jeff stepped back in shock. The man’s hair was neatly combed and his pajamas nicely pressed.

“What happened?” Jeff asked with surprise. “Telephone operators as supposed to be as sexy as their voices.”

“Son, don’t ever marry a telephone operator,” the man groaned. “All I heard last night was her nasal voice saying, ‘Your three minutes are up, your three minutes are up’.”

.
.
.

Jeff returned to his desk, sure that the teacher’s husband would be calling at any moment.

Finally, at 4 p.m., the teacher’s husband called for breakfast.

Jeff couldn’t believe it, but quickly took the breakfast to the couple’s room. When the man opened the door, Jeff stepped back in shock. The man was wearing only a pair of boxers, his hair was a mess, and there were scratches all over his chest, arms and legs.

“My goodness sir, what happened to you?” Jeff asked, fearing the worst. “Did you have a fight?”

The man, grinning from ear to ear, happily replied, “No. Son, when you marry be sure it’s to a school teacher. All I heard last night was her sexy, smooth voice saying, ‘We’re going to do this over, and over, and over again, until we get it right’.”

Saturday, 8 March 2014

A Poor Young Boy and The Dog






A few days ago I landed at the Bombay Airport (India) and took a cab to my scheduled destination in South Bombay.

I was enjoying the busy traffic with people rushing in every possible directions then we got stranded at a very busy intersection.

As we waited for the signal to turn green, my eyes met up with a poor young boy, about 12 years old. He removed a piece of bread from his pocket and took a bite.

As he was about to take his next bite, a stray dog wagged his tail looking at him. Without hesitation, he sat down and put the bread on the road for the dog to eat.

The dog sniffed the bread and walked away. The boy waited until he was sure the dog was gone then he picked up the bread and ate it!

My heart cried and wanted to walk up to the boy but before I could open the door the signal turned Green and our car drove away. I kept thinking about the boy and later during my evening meal I realized that I was thinking of approaching the boy but never did, I could have stopped the car and walked up to him which again I never did.

All I did was “thinking” and this poor little boy who had only one piece of bread without any hesitation sharing it with the dog, though he himself seemed to be very hungry.

I learnt one of the biggest lessons in my life which that boy taught me without a conversation. He taught me to share with love and happiness. I am so blessed to have learnt this beautiful lesson from my ‘little unknown master’. It is my moral duty to share this incident with all my friends across the globe and be blessed with happiness.

Thank you friends for making this world a beautiful place to dwell.

I know the whole truth



I know the whole truth

At school Little Johnny was told by a classmate that most adults are hiding at least one dark secret, and that this makes it very easy to blackmail them by saying,

“I know the whole truth.”

Little Johnny decides to go home and try it out.
He goes home, and as he is greeted by his mother he says, “I know the whole truth.”

His mother quickly hands him $20 and says, “Just don’t tell your father.”

Quite pleased, the boy waits for his father to get home from work, and greets him with, “I know the whole truth.”

The father promptly hands him $40 and says, “Please don’t say a word to your mother.”

Very pleased, the boy is on his way to school the next day when he sees the mailman at his front door. The boy greets him by saying, “I know the whole truth.”

The mailman immediately drops the mail, opens his arms, and says,

“Then come give your real father a big hug.”

Friday, 7 March 2014

STORY — THE LITTLE GIRL





One rainy afternoon I was driving along one of the main streets of town, taking those extra precautions necessary when the roads are wet and slick.

Suddenly, my daughter, spoke up from her relaxed position in her seat. “Dad, I’m thinking of something.”

This announcement usually meant she had been pondering some fact for a while, and was now ready to expound all that her six-year-old mind had discovered. I was eager to hear. What are you thinking?” I asked.

“The rain,” she began, “is like sin, and the windshield wipers are like God wiping our sins away.”

After the chill bumps raced up my arms I was able to respond. “That’s really good,” Then my curiosity broke in. How far would this little girl take this revelation? So I asked… ”Do you notice how the rain keeps on coming? What does that tell you?”

She didn’t hesitate one moment with her answer: “We keep on sinning, and God just keeps on forgiving us.”

I will always remember this whenever I turn my wipers on.
God bless us all.

Student Counting Apples




A teacher teaching Maths to seven-year-old Laiq askCPS Math Applesed him, “If I give you one apple and one apple and one apple, how many apples will you have?”

Within a few seconds Laiq replied confidently, “Four!”

The dismayed teacher was expecting an effortless correct answer, three. She was disappointed. “Maybe the child did not listen properly.” – she thought.

She repeated, “Laiq, listen carefully. If I give you one apple and one apple and one apple, how many apples will you have?”

Laiq had seen the disappointment on his teacher’s face. He calculated again on his fingers. But within him he was also searching for the answer that will make the teacher happy. His search for the answer was not for the correct one, but the one that will make his teacher happy.

This time hesitatingly he replied, “Four.”

The disappointment stayed on the teacher’s face. She remembered that Laiq liked strawberries.

She thought maybe he doesn’t like apples and that is making him loose focus.

This time with an exaggerated excitement and twinkling in her eyes she asked, “If I give you one strawberry and one strawberry and one strawberry, then how many you will have?”

Seeing the teacher happy, young Laiq calculated on his fingers again. There was no pressure on him, but a little on the teacher. She wanted her new approach to succeed.

With a hesitating smile young Laiq replied, “Three?”

The teacher now had a victorious smile. Her approach had succeeded. She wanted to congratulate herself.

But one last thing remained. Once again she asked him, “Now if I give you one apple and one apple and one more apple how many will you have?”

Promptly Laiq answered, “Four!”

The teacher was aghast. “How Laiq, how?” she demanded in a little stern and irritated voice.

In a voice that was low and hesitating young Laiq replied, “Because I already have one apple in my bag.”

Author Unknown




Contributing without Recognition! ( Most READABLE STORY )




There was a farmer who had a horse and a goat…..One day, the horse became ill and he called the veterinarian, who said: – Well, your horse has a virus. He must take this medicine for three days. I’ll come back on the 3rd day and if he’s not better, we’re going to have to put him down.

Nearby, the goat listened closely to their conversation. The next day, they gave him the medicine and left. The goat approached the horse and said: – Be strong, my friend.
Get up or else they’re going to put you to sleep!

On the second day, they gave him the medicine and left. The goat came back and said:
- Come on buddy, get up or else you’re going to die! Come on, I’ll help you get up.
Let’s go! One, two, three…

On the third day, they came to give him the medicine and the vet said:
- Unfortunately, we’re going to have to put him down tomorrow. Otherwise, the virus might spread and infect the other horses. After they left, the goat approached the horse and said:
- Listen pal, it’s now or never! Get up, come on! Have courage! Come on! Get up! Get up!
That’s it, slowly! Great! Come on, one, two, three… Good, good. Now faster, come on…… Fantastic! Run, run more! Yes! Yay! Yes! You did it, you’re a champion!!!

All of a sudden, the owner came back, saw the horse running in the field and began shouting:
- It’s a miracle! My horse is cured. We must have a grand** **party. Let’s kill the goat!!!!*
***
The Lesson:* this often happens in the workplace & life in general . Nobody truly knows which employee or people actually deserves the merit of success & are in fact contributing towards success , or who’s actually contributing the necessary support to make things happen. Be grateful.
Remember………
*LEARNING TO LIVE WITHOUT RECOGNITION IS A SKILL!!!!*
If anyone ever tells you that your work is unprofessional, remember:
Amateurs built the Ark [which saved all the species]
and
professionals built the Titanic [all died tragically]


Thursday, 6 March 2014

True love ( A Must Read )





He met her at a party. She was so outstanding, many guys chasing after her, while he was so normal, nobody paid attention to him.

At the end of the party, he invited her to have coffee with him, she was surprised but due to being polite, she promised. They sat in a nice coffee shop, he was too nervous to say anything, she felt uncomfortable, and she thought to herself, "Please, let me go home..."

Suddenly he asked the waiter, "Would you please give me some salt? I'd like to put it in my coffee." Everybody stared at him, so strange! His face turned red but still, he put the salt in his coffee and drank it. She asked him curiously, "Why you have this hobby?"

 He replied, "When I was a little boy, I lived near the sea, I liked playing in the sea, I could feel the taste of the sea, just like the taste of the salty coffee. Now every time I have the salty coffee, I always think of my childhood, think of my hometown, I miss my hometown so much,

I miss my parents who are still living there." While saying that tears filled his eyes. She was deeply touched. That's his true feeling, from the bottom of his heart. A man who can tell out his homesickness, he must be a man who loves home, cares about home, has responsibility of home... Then she also started to speak, spoke about her faraway hometown, her childhood, her family.

That was a really nice talk, also a beautiful beginning of their story. They continued to date. She found that actually he was a man who meets all her demands; he had tolerance, was kind hearted, warm, careful. He was such a good person but she almost missed him! Thanks to his salty coffee! Then the story was just like every beautiful love story, the princess married to the prince, and then they were living the happy life... And, every time she made coffee for him, she put some salt in the coffee, as she knew that's the way he liked it.

After 40 years, he passed away, left her a letter which said, "My dearest, please forgive me, forgive my whole life's lie. This was the only lie I said to you---the salty coffee. Remember the first time we dated? I was so nervous at that time, actually I wanted some sugar, but I said salt. It was hard for me to change so I just went ahead. I never thought that could be the start of our communication! I tried to tell you the truth many times in my life, but I was too afraid to do that, as I have promised not to lie to you for anything... Now I'm dying, I afraid of nothing so I tell you the truth, I don't like the salty coffee, what a strange bad taste... But I have had the salty coffee for my whole life! Since I knew you, I never feel sorry for anything I do for you. Having you with me is my biggest happiness for my whole life. If I can live for the second time, still want to know you and have you for my whole life, even though I have to drink the salty coffee again."

Her tears made the letter totally wet. Someday, someone asked her, "What's the taste of salty coffee?" She replied, "It's sweet."

Pass this to everyone because love is not to forget but to forgive, not to see but understand, not to hear but to listen, not to let go but HOLD ON!! ???

10 things a girl probably doesn't know about a guy :





1. Guys are more emotional then they think, if they loved them truly.

2. Guys may be flirting around all day but before they go to sleep, they always think about the girl they truly care about.

3. Guys go crazy over a girl's smile.

4. A guy who likes you wants to be the only guy you talk to.

5. Guys are more emotional than they'd like people to think.

6. Girls are guys' weaknesses.

7. If a guy tells you about his problems, he just needs someone to listen to him. You don't need to give advice.

8. When a guy asks you to leave him alone, he's just actually saying, "Please come and listen to me."

9. No guy can handle all his problems on his own. He's just too stubborn to admit it.

10. When a guy sacrifices his sleep and health just to be with you, he really likes you and wants to be with you as much as possible.

Want a day off work?



So you want a day off. Let’s take a look at what you are asking for. There are 365 days

 per year available for work. There are 52 weeks per year in which you already have 2 days

off per week, leaving 261 days available for work. Since you spend 16 hours each day

away fron work, you have used up 170 days, leaving only 91 days available.

 You spend 30 minutes each day on coffee break which counts for 23 days each year,

 leaving only 68 days available. With a 1 hour lunch each day, you used up another

 46 days, leaving only 22 days available for work. You normally spend 2 days per

year on sick leave. This leaves you only 20 days per year available for work.

We are off 5 holidays per year, so your available working time is down to 15 days.

 We generously give 14 days vacation per year which leaves only 1 day

 available for work and I’ll be darned if you are going to take that day off!

Wednesday, 5 March 2014

Love is a Gift



“Can I see my baby?” the happy new mother asked.

When the bundle was nestled in her arms and she moved the fold of cloth to look upon his tiny face, she gasped. The doctor turned quickly and looked out the tall hospital window. The baby had been born without ears.

Time proved that the baby’s hearing was perfect. It was only his appearance that was marred. When he rushed home from school one day and flung himself into his mother’s arms, she sighed, knowing that his life was to be a succession of heartbreaks. He blurted out the tragedy. “A boy, a big boy … called me a freak.”

He grew up, handsome for his misfortune. A favorite with his fellow students, he might have been class president, but for that. He developed a gift, a talent for literature and music. “But you might mingle with other young people,” his mother reproved him, but felt a kindness in her heart. The boy’s father had a session with the family physician. Could nothing be done? “I believe I could graft on a pair of outer ears, if they could be procured,” the doctor decided.

Whereupon the search began for a person who would make such a sacrifice for a young man. Two years went by. Then, “You are going to the hospital, Son. Mother and I have someone who will donate the ears you need. But it’s a secret,” said the father. The operation was a brilliant success, and a new person emerged. His talents blossomed into genius, and school and college became a series of triumphs.

Later he married and entered the diplomatic service. “But I must know!” He urged his father, “Who gave so much for me? I could never do enough for him.” “I do not believe you could,” said the father, “but the agreement was that you are not to know … not yet.” The years kept their profound secret, but the day did come … one of the darkest days that a son must endure. He stood with his father over his mother’s casket. Slowly, tenderly, the father stretched forth a hand and raised the thick, reddish-brown hair to reveal that the mother had no outer ears. “Mother said she was glad she never let her hair be cut,” he whispered gently, “and nobody ever thought Mother less beautiful, did they?”

Moral;
Real beauty lies not in the physical appearance, but in the heart. Real treasure lies not in what that can be seen, but what that cannot be seen. Real love lies not in what is done and known, but in what that is done but not known.




20 tips to make your marriage successful


1. Trust, help each other, be good and stay positive.

2. Please your spouse and make him/her feel special always.

3. Be humorous, playful, helpful, respectful and entertaining.

4. N
ever bring your past mistakes in your today.

5. Encourage and give hope to your spouse.

6. Do not compare each other even fortiny things.

7. Surprise your spouse with something new.

8. Spent time as much as you can.

9. Get ready for your spouse as they want you to get ready and look beautiful always.

10. Listen carefully and obey sincerely.

11. Avoid fighting, ignoring, lying, doubting, misbehaving and getting angry.

12. Be open and discuss your problems/ worries to your spouse.

13. If one of you is angry, the other should be quiet.

14. Don't argue. Simply say ‘Sorry’ whether it’s your mistake or not.

15. Always make Dua to make your marriage successful and your relationship/ bond strong.

16. Always be thankful to your spouse.

17. Say ‘I love you’ to your spouse.

18. Understand each other.

19. Make eye contact while speaking.

20. Eat together, be together and pray together...!!!

Funny No Arm Man



Funny No Arm Man

A man had lost an arm from an accident.

He became very depressed because he loved to play golf.

One day in his despair, he decided to commit suicide.

He got on an elevator and went to the top of a building to jump off.

He was standing on the ledge looking down and saw this man skipping along, whooping and kicking up his heels. He looked closer and saw that this man didn’t have any arms at all.

He started thinking, what am I doing up here feeling sorry for myself, I still have one good arm to do things with.

There goes a man with no arms skipping down the sidewalk so happy, and going on with his life.

He hurried down and caught up with the man with no arms.

He told him how glad he was to see him because he lost one of his arms and felt useless and was going to kill himself.

He thanked him again for saving his life and said he knew he could make it with one arm if that guy could go on with no arms.

The man with no arms began dancing and whooping and kicking up his heels again.
He asked, “Why are you so happy anyway?”

He said, “I’m NOT happy. My balls itch.”

Old Lady and Bank President



Old Lady and Bank President

A little old lady went into the Bank one day, carrying a bag of money. She asked to speak with the bank president to open an account because, “It’s a lot of money!” The reluctant staff finally ushered her into his office. The bank president then asked her how much she would like to deposit. She replied, “$165,000!” and dumped the cash on his desk.

The president was of course curious as to how she came by all this cash, so he asked her, “Ma’am, where did you get this money?” The old lady replied, “I make bets.” The president then asked, “Bets? What kind of bets?” The old woman said, “Well, for example, I’ll bet you $25,000 that your balls are square.” “Ha!” laughed the president, “That’s a stupid bet…

You can never win that kind of bet!” The old lady challenged, “So, would you like to take my bet?” “Sure,” said the president, “I’ll bet $25,000 that my balls are not square!” The old lady said, “Okay, but since there is a lot of money involved, may I bring my lawyer with me tomorrow at 10:00 am as a witness?” “Sure!” replied the confident president. That night, he was very nervous about the bet and often checked his balls in the mirror.

The next morning, at precisely 10:00 am, the little old lady appeared with her lawyer at the president’s office. She introduced the lawyer to the president and repeated the bet: “$25,000 says the president’s balls are square!” The president agreed with the bet again and the old lady asked him to drop his pants so they could all see. The president complied.

The little old lady peered closely at his balls and then asked if she could feel them. “Well, Okay,” said the president, “$25,000 is a lot of money, so I guess you should be absolutely sure.” Just then, he noticed that the lawyer was quietly banging his head against the wall. The president said, “What’s wrong with your lawyer?”

She replied, “Nothing, except I bet him $100,000 that at 10:00 am today, I’d have the Bank president’s balls in my hand!”

Beautiful Conversation




Girl : why do you keep on following me ?

Boy : because you are so pretty and i think i am falling in love with you.

Girl : really?…… but you haven’t met my friend yet. she is more prettier than me and she is right behind you

(the guy looking behind him but found no one)

Boy : are you making fun of me ?
there is no one behind me..

Girl : no, but if u really love me, u won’t look back.

because love never happens with the beauty of face. but with the beauty of hearts….

5 GOOD MESSAGES:



1.Once, all villagers decided to pray for rain, on the day of prayer all the People gathered but only one boy came with an umbrella.
THAT'S FAITH!!

2. When you throw a baby in the air, she laughs because she knows you will catch her.
THAT'S TRUST!!

3. Every night we go to bed, without any assurance of being alive the next Morning but still we set the alarms to wake up.
THAT'S HOPE!!

4. We plan big things for tomorrow in spite of zero knowledge of the future.
THAT'S CONFIDENCE!!

And Lastly to make you SMILE:

5. We see the world suffering.. But still we get married.
THAT'S OVER CONFIDENCE!! 

Tuesday, 4 March 2014

A glass of Milk, paid in Full



One day, a poor boy who was selling goods from door to door to pay his way through school, found he had only one thin dime left, and he was hungry. He decided he would ask for a meal at the next house. However, he lost his nerve when a lovely young woman opened the door.

Instead of a meal he asked for a drink of water. She thought he looked hungry so brought him a large glass of milk.

He drank it slowly, and then asked, “How much do I owe you?”

“You don’t owe me anything,” she replied. “Mother has taught us never to accept pay for a kindness.”

He said, “Then I thank you from my heart.”

As Howard Kelly left that house, he not only felt stronger physically, but his faith in God and man was strong also. He had been ready to give up and quit.

Year’s later that young woman became critically ill. The local doctors were baffled. They finally sent her to the big city, where they called in specialists to study her rare disease.

Dr. Howard Kelly was called in for the consultation. When he heard the name of the town she came from, a strange light filled his eyes. Immediately he rose and went down the hall of the hospital to her room.

Dressed in his doctor’s gown he went in to see her. He recognized her at once. He went back to the consultation room determined to do his best to save her life. From that day he gave special attention to the case.

After a long struggle, the battle was won. Dr. Kelly requested the business office to pass the final bill to him for approval. He looked at it, then wrote something on the edge and the bill was sent to her room.

She feared to open it, for she was sure it would take the rest of her life to pay for it all. Finally she looked, and something caught her attention on the side of the bill. She began to read the following words:

“Paid in full with one glass of milk”

Signed, Dr. Howard Kelly.

ADVICE TO LADIES, ESPECIALLY THOSE IN THEIR TWENTIES...



1. Guys love to marry an Independent and Matured lady... So instead of sitting there and waiting to be bluffed by a guy, focus on getting a career that would take you out of the house wife category...

2. Never let the sweet talks of guys deceive you, most times they just want to go between your legs and run off thereafter.

3. Remove the mentality from your mind that guys will keep springing up to approach you. The older you get by the day, the less toasters you will have.

4. Playing 'too' hard to get is the worst thing you should ever start, remember, Nothing lasts forever. If you still doubt, check out the number of matured single ladies looking up to GOD FOR A MIRACLE.

5. Never extort things from a guy you don't love, guys always have ways of paying a girl back, either through their FRIENDS or total 'PAID' STRANGERS....BE CAREFUL.

6. Never be deceived you can trap a guy through sex. A man will also return to his wife who sex starves him for years once he loves and trust her. You can never win a man over with your body.

7. If all you take to the relationship is the mind set to EXTRACT MONEY from him, don't complain if all he ask from you is your body. He has seen you have nothing else to offer...

8. Don't be fooled when Guys tell you they have never met a prettier girl, they will say that same thing to an80year old woman they want to get intimate with.

9. A guy always taking you to the SILVER-BIRD, FAST FOOD (pizza in or galitos), MALL AND EVENTS AT CONFERENCE CENTER /NATIONAL THEATRE is no sign that he loves you, if he doesn't care to ask and PLAN YOUR FUTURE TOGETHER then you are just his 'SOCIAL MATE' and nothing else....

10. If the only time he invites you over is when he needs to cook, clean the house and do his laundry, then just know you are his "executive house help".

11. If he avoids meeting your family and close friends then it is an obvious sign he is just playing games with you.

12. Don't always change the tv station from NTV to CHANNEL O, MTV and Fashion TV. Take time to find out what is bothering him and how you can help out.

13. If the only places he doesn't frown when you enter are his bedroom and kitchen then know you aren't welcome (only being used).

Have you noticed that most of the ladies that end up being emotionally abused are the ones at the receiving end...Always with open arms, requesting for something and ready to receive...

The more you widen your arms, the more he widens your legs...

A grown up guy who gives the excuse about his parents being wild when he brings female visitors to the house is a sign that
HE HAS A SERIOUS GIRL AND HAS INTRODUCED HER TO HIS PARENTS ALREADY... ADVISE YOURSELF...
FINALLY, I ALWAYS SAY THIS AND WILL REPEAT IT AGAIN... It's better to be sitting in a taxi smiling happily than to be in your husband’s fresh air conditioned BMW x6 with bruised eyes wearing a fresh Gucci shades alongside a Burberry scarf....

JUST REMEMBER, THAT DATING A RICH MAN DOESN'T GUARANTEE HAPPINESS IN MARRIAGE... MONEY IS
NOT EVERYTHING.....MAKING RIGHT CHOICES IN LIFE IS WHAT MATTERS MOST...

Share it on your wall and let know other ladies too...

The important things in life




A philosophy professor stood before his class with some items on the table in front of him. When the class began, wordlessly he picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with rocks, about 2 inches in diameter.

He then asked the students if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.

So the professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles, of course, rolled into the open areas between the rocks.

He then asked the students again if the jar was full. They agreed it was.

The professor picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else.
He then asked once more if the jar was full. The students responded with a unanimous “Yes.”

“Now,” said the professor, “I want you to recognize that this jar represents your life. The rocks are the important things – your family, your partner, your health, your children – things that if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full.

The pebbles are the other things that matter – like your job, your house, your car.

The sand is everything else. The small stuff.”

“If you put the sand into the jar first,” he continued “there is no room for the pebbles or the rocks. The same goes for your life.

If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are important to you. Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Play with your children. Take your partner out dancing. There will always be time to go to work, clean the house, give a dinner party and fix the disposal.

Take care of the rocks first – the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just sand.”



40 Tips for Happy Health Life - MUST READ & SHARE


Health:

1. Drink plenty of water.
2. Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner like a beggar.
3. Eat more foods that grow on trees and plants, and eat less food that is manufactured in plants.
4. Live with the 3 E’s — Energy, Enthusiasm, and Empathy.
5. Make time for prayer and reflection
6. Play more games.
7. Read more books than you did in 2012.
8. Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day.
9. Sleep for 7 hours.

Personality:
10. Take a 10-30 minutes walk every day —- and while you walk, smile.
11. Don’t compare your life to others’. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
12. Don’t have negative thoughts or things you cannot control. Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment.
13. Don’t over do; keep your limits.
14. Don’t take yourself so seriously; no one else does.
15. Don’t waste your precious energy on gossip.
16. Dream more while you are awake.
17. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
18. Forget issues of the past. Don’t remind your partner with his/her mistakes of the past. That will ruin your present happiness.
19. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone. Don’t hate others.
20. Make peace with your past so it won’t spoil the present.
21. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.
22. Realize that life is a school and you are here to learn. Problems are simply part of the curriculum that appear and fade away like algebra class but the lessons you learn will last a lifetime.
23. Smile and laugh more.
24. You don’t have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.

Community:
25. Call your family often.
26. Each day give something good to others.
27. Forgive everyone for everything.
28. Spend time with people over the age of 70 & under the age of 6.
29. Try to make at least three people smile each day.
30. What other people think of you is none of your business.
31. Your job won’t take care of you when you are sick. Your family and friends will. Stay in touch.

Life:
32. Do the right things.
33. Get rid of anything that isn’t useful, beautiful or joyful.
34. Forgiveness heals everything.
35. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
36. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
37. The best is yet to come.
38. When you awake alive in the morning, don’t take it for granted – embrace life.
39. Your inner most is always happy. So, be happy.

Last but not least:
40. Enjoy LIFE!

PLEASE SHARE THIS POST WITH YOUR BELOVED ONES

Monday, 3 March 2014

I Believe (Inspirational)



   I believe-
    That we don’t have to change friends if we understand that friends change.

    I believe-
    That no matter how good a friend is, they’re going to hurt you every once in a
    while and, you must forgive them for that.
 
I believe-
    That true friendship continues to grow, even over the longest distance.
    Same goes for true love.

    I believe-
    That you can do something in an instant that will give you heartache for life.

    I believe-
    That it’s taking me a long time to become the person I want to be.
 
I believe-
    That you should always leave loved ones with loving words. It may be the last time you see them

    I believe-
    That you can keep going long after you can’t.

    I believe-
    That we are responsible for what  we do, no matter how we feel.
 
I believe-
    That either you control your attitude or it controls you.

    I believe-
    That regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion fades and there
    had better be something else to take its place.

    I believe-
    That heroes are the people who do what has to be done when it needs to be done,
    regardless of the consequences.
    I believe-
    That money is a lousy way of keeping score.

    I believe-
    That my best friend and I can do anything or nothing and have the best time!

    I believe-
    That sometimes the people you expect to kick you when you’re down, will be the ones to help you get back up.

  I believe-
    That sometimes when I’m angry I have the right to be angry, but that doesn’t give me the right to be cruel.

    I believe-
    That just because someone doesn’t love you the way you want them to doesn’t mean they don’t love you with all they have.

    I believe-
    That maturity has more to do with what types of experiences you’ve had and what you’ve
    learned from them and less to do with how many birthdays you’ve celebrated.

    I believe-
    That it isn’t always enough to be forgiven by others.
    Sometimes you have to learn to forgive yourself.

    I believe-
    That no matter how bad your heart is broken the world doesn’t stop for your grief.

    I believe-
    That our background and circumstances may have influenced
    who we are, but we are responsible for who we become.

    I believe-
    That just because two people argue, it doesn’t mean they don’t love each other,  And just
    because they don’t argue, it doesn’t mean they do.

    I believe-
    That you shouldn’t be so eager to find out a secret. It could change your life forever.

    I believe-
    That two people can look at the exact same thing and see something totally different.

    I believe-
    That your life can be changed in a matter of hours by people who don’t even know you.

    I believe-
    That even when you think you have no more to give, when a
    friend cries out to you – you will find the strength to help.

    I believe-
    That credentials on the wall do not make you a decent human being.

    I believe-
    That the people you care about most in life are the essence of life.
    Tell them today how much you love them and what they mean to you.




Kisses as monthly pay




Kisses as monthly pay

A Husband working in some other city wrote to his wife in his home town.

Dear Darling,

I can’t send you my salary this month because the global market crisis has affected my Company’s performance, so I am sending 100 kisses.

You are my sweetheart, please understand and adjust with this situation.

Your loving husband,

His wife replied

Hey hubby

Thanks for the 100 kisses.

Below is the list of expenses I paid with the Kisses
1. The Milk man agreed on 2 kisses for one month’s milk.

2. The electricity man, agreed not to disconnect only after 7 kisses.

3. Your landlord comes every day to take 2 or 3 kisses instead of
the monthly rent.

4. Supermarket owner did not accept kisses only,so I gave him other items, I hope you understand.

5. Miscellaneous expenses 40 kisses.

Please don’t worry about me, I still have a balance of 35 kisses and

I hope I can survive the month using this balance.

Shall I plan the same for the next month?

Your Sweet Heart

Redneck letter



dear son, im writing this slow because i know you cant read fast. we dont live

 where we did when you left home.your dad read in the newspaper that most

 accidents happen within 20 miles of your home, so we moved. i wont be able

to send you the address because the last family that lived here took the house

 numbers when they moved so they wouldnt have to change their address.

 this place is really nice. it even has a washing machine. im not sure about it.

 i put a load of clothes in and pulled the chain. we havent seen them since.

 the weather isnt bad here. it only rained twice last week. the first time for

 three days and the second time for four days. auntie maude has sent you

a pair of socks she knit, she put a third one in because she heard you have

 grown another foot since she last saw you. about that coat you wanted me

to send your uncle billy said it would be too heavy to send in the mail with

the buttons on so we cut them off and put them in the pockets. jimmy locked

 his keys in the car yesterday. we where really worried because it took him

two hours to get me and your father out. three of your friends went off a

 bridge in a pickup truck. butch was driving. he rolled down the window

and swam to safety. your other two friends were in the back. they drowned

 because they couldnt get the tailgate down. there isnt much more news at

the time. nothing much out of the normal has happened. your favorite aunt, mom







Blonde Arguing over first class



A plane is on its way to Toronto when a blonde woman in economy class gets up and moves

 to the first class section and sits down. The flight attendant watches her do this and asks

to see her ticket, and then explains that since she paid for economy class she must return

 to her seat in the back. The woman replies, “I’m blonde, I’m beautiful, I’m going to

Toronto and I’m staying right here.”

The flight attendant goes into the cockpit and tells the pilot and the copilot about this blonde

 second class passenger sitting in first class and refusing to move back to her seat.

 The co-pilot leaves the cockpit and tries to explain to the blonde passenger that she must

go back to economy class because she didn’t pay for first class, but she insists,

 “I’m blonde, I’m beautiful, I’m going to Toronto and I’m staying right here.”

The co-pilot returns to the cockpit and warns him that they’d better have some

policemen waiting to arrest the blonde woman because she won’t listen to reason.

The pilot tells him, “I’m married to a blonde and I speak their language.

 I”ll try to convince her.” He leaves the cockpit, approaches the blonde

 passenger and whispers something in her ear.

“Oh, I’m sorry!” she apologizes, gets up and immediately returns to her

seat in second class.

“What did you tell her?” the flight attendant and co-pilot ask in amazement.

“I told her that first class isn’t going to Toronto,” he explained.

Sunday, 2 March 2014

Time With Someone You Love




A man came home from work late, tired and irritated, to find his 5-year old son waiting for him at the door.

SON: ‘Daddy, may I ask you a question?’

DAD: ‘Yeah sure, what it is?’ replied the man.

SON: ‘Daddy, how much do you make an hour?’

DAD: ‘That’s none of your business. Why do you ask such a thing?’ the man said angrily.

SON: ‘I just want to know. Please tell me, how much do you make an hour?’

DAD: ‘If you must know, I make $50 an hour.’

SON: ‘Oh,’ the little boy replied, with his head down.

SON: ‘Daddy, may I please borrow $25?’

The father was furious, ‘If the only reason you asked that is so you can borrow some money to buy a silly toy or some other nonsense, then you march yourself straight to your room and go to bed. Think about why you are being so selfish. I don’t work hard everyday for such childish frivolities.’


The little boy quietly went to his room and shut the door.
The man sat down and started to get even angrier about the little boy’s questions. How dare he ask such questions only to get some money?

After about an hour or so, the man had calmed down, and started to think:

Maybe there was something he really needed to buy with that $25.00 and he really didn’t ask for money very often The man went to the door of the little boy’s room and opened the door.

‘Are you asleep, son?’ He asked.

‘No daddy, I’m awake,’ replied the boy.

‘I’ve been thinking, maybe I was too hard on you earlier’ said the man. ‘It’s been a long day and I took out my aggravation on you. Here’s the $25 you asked for.’

The little boy sat straight up, smiling. ‘Oh, thank you daddy!’ he yelled. Then, reaching under his pillow he pulled out some crumpled up bills.

The man saw that the boy already had money, started to get angry again.

The little boy slowly counted out his money, and then looked up at his father.

‘Why do you want more money if you already have some?’ the father grumbled.

‘Because I didn’t have enough, but now I do,’ the little boy replied.

‘Daddy, I have $50 now. Can I buy an hour of your time? Please come home early tomorrow. I would like to have dinner with you.’

The father was crushed. He put his arms around his little son, and he begged for his forgiveness.

Little things can make a big difference.



There was a man taking a morning wa lk at or the beach. He saw that along with the morning tide

came hundreds of starfish and when the tide receded, they were left behind and with the morning

sun rays, they would die. The tide was fresh and the starfish were alive. The man took a few steps,

picked one and threw it into the water. He did that repeatedly. Right behind him there was another person who couldn’t understand what this man was doing. He caught up with him and asked,

“What are you doing? There are hundreds of starfish. How many can you help? What difference

does it make?” This man did not reply, took two more steps, picked up another one, threw it into

the water, and said, “It makes a difference to this one.”

Moral:

What difference are we making? Big or small, it does not matter. If everyone made a small

difference, we’d end up with a big difference, wouldn’t we? You can’t save everyone but you can

make a difference by helping one person today.

Saturday, 1 March 2014

Marriage isn't for you



Having been married only a year and a half, I’ve recently come to the conclusion that marriage isn’t for me.

Now before you start making assumptions, keep reading.

I met my wife in high school when we were 15 years old. We were friends for ten years until…until we decided no longer wanted to be just friends. :) I strongly recommend that best friends fall in love. Good times will be had by all.

Nevertheless, falling in love with my best friend did not prevent me from having certain fears and anxieties about getting married. The nearer Kim and I approached the decision to marry, the more I was filled with a paralyzing fear. Was I ready? Was I making the right choice? Was Kim the right person to marry? Would she make me happy?

Then, one fateful night, I shared these thoughts and concerns with my dad.

Perhaps each of us have moments in our lives when it feels like time slows down or the air becomes still and everything around us seems to draw in, marking that moment as one we will never forget.

My dad giving his response to my concerns was such a moment for me. With a knowing smile he said, “Seth, you’re being totally selfish. So I’m going to make this really simple: marriage isn’t for you. You don’t marry to make yourself happy, you marry to make someone else happy. More than that, your marriage isn’t for yourself, you’re marrying for a family. Not just for the in-laws and all of that nonsense, but for your future children. Who do you want to help you raise them? Who do you want to influence them? Marriage isn’t for you. It’s not about you. Marriage is about the person you married.”

It was in that very moment that I knew that Kim was the right person to marry. I realized that I wanted to make her happy; to see her smile every day, to make her laugh every day. I wanted to be a part of her family, and my family wanted her to be a part of ours. And thinking back on all the times I had seen her play with my nieces, I knew that she was the one with whom I wanted to build our own family.

My father’s advice was both shocking and revelatory. It went against the grain of today’s “Walmart philosophy”, which is if it doesn’t make you happy, you can take it back and get a new one.

No, a true marriage (and true love) is never about you. It’s about the person you love—their wants, their needs, their hopes, and their dreams. Selfishness demands, “What’s in it for me?”, while Love asks, “What can I give?”

Some time ago, my wife showed me what it means to love selflessly. For many months, my heart had been hardening with a mixture of fear and resentment. Then, after the pressure had built up to where neither of us could stand it, emotions erupted. I was callous. I was selfish.

But instead of matching my selfishness, Kim did something beyond wonderful—she showed an outpouring of love. Laying aside all of the pain and aguish I had caused her, she lovingly took me in her arms and soothed my soul.

Marriage is about family. I realized that I had forgotten my dad’s advice. While Kim’s side of the marriage had been to love me, my side of the marriage had become all about me. This awful realization brought me to tears, and I promised my wife that I would try to be better.

To all who are reading this article—married, almost married, single, or even the sworn bachelor or bachelorette—I want you to know that marriage isn’t for you. No true relationship of love is for you. Love is about the person you love.

And, paradoxically, the more you truly love that person, the more love you receive. And not just from your significant other, but from their friends and their family and thousands of others you never would have met had your love remained self-centered.

Truly, love and marriage isn’t for you. It’s for others. 

Have You Checked Your Horoscope Of 2014 ??







Check your Do’s and Dont’s of 2014

Aries 2014 Horoscope (March 21 to April 19)

If you thought 2014 would be dull, think again. And again. And again! Because, for certain,this will be a year when you’ll do a lot of reassessment.

For some people, especially the Aries, this could threaten to sink into self-absorption. But with all that’s happening, especially with the Capricorn Moon in late January causing a flurry of excessive self-examination, you certainly have the right to be introspective.

However, others may not see it that way. With the overflow of Cancer’s influence in the June of 2014, your attention will naturally drift to the people you love: family, friends, and even acquaintances – all with their own troubles.

There’s a marked desire to make your home a place of refuge, and August’s Sun in Leo trine the Moon in Aries brings you the determination to make things better for others. It helps you, it helps your loved ones – everyone’s happy!

Taurus 2014 Horoscope (April 20 to May 20)

At the beginning of the year, you’re going to be channeling Greta Garbo in “wanting to be alone.” You’ve got a lot on your mind, and though you might have a few days here and there of major support, you’re mostly going to be lost in your thoughts. However, this is likely to dissipate into a desire for Taurus-style action.

Unfortunately, by the time you’re more focused, schedules between you and others might start conflicting, leading to an atmosphere of casual frustration. It won’t last.

The Annular Solar Eclipse on April 28-29 should bring your social and private life to a pleasant and steady rhythm. The summer promises a more synchronized and steady routine that will allow you to stay focused on important tasks and chores while granting you the free time to get out and have fun with friends.

This balance might face a few hiccups as a friend or relative will test your resolve around late November, but don’t let it get to you. All in all, you’re holding your own very well!

Gemini 2014 Horoscope (May 21 to June 20)

Your aims this year are going to make you very single-minded. You will likely have a personal financial goal that will prompt a do-or-die feeling all year. You’re going to face a number of planetary influences that will have you measuring your progress, thus giving you a concrete feeling of moving ahead.

However, starting right out of the gate with the Moon in Aries opposing Mars in Libra on January 7, you’ll also feel the tension between maintaining a satisfactory personal life and achieving a deeply desired objective. That may not be helped by friends wishing to keep you “in the circle,” but family, on the other hand, will be more supportive. Family members might have minor quarrels at times but they’re easily overcome.

The ultimate point is that your hard work is producing results, and few can really object to that. The aspects altogether are good for personal goals, provided you don’t let outsiders guilt you into deviating from your course. True friends will understand your needs!

Cancer 2014 Horoscope (June 21 to July 22)

Dreams, ideas, and personal connections are going to be extremely valuable to you at the beginning of this year. You have a lot of ideas to sort through, and your friends can be very helpful in making this happen. Some of these ideas can seem very powerful, and others can seem a bit peculiar, but none of them should be dismissed. Jupiter is in your sign at the beginning of the year, and he’s giving an approving nod to your idea-making.

With such mental stimulation, it seems you’re charged like a battery, even when Jupiter leaves your sign on July 16. You may feel a bit abandoned for a while, and not want to talk, but you’ll have developed enough favor that people will trust your intuition in even the most confusing of crises!

What’s more, your charged confidence will exert itself once again, and come to a head toward the end of the summer. Keep your head up, and don’t let the smallest clues pass you by.

Leo 2014 Horoscope (July 23 to August 22)

If you have a taste for the unusual, this is going to be the year for you! Uranus is mostly in Aries this year, and during the year it creates interesting and harmonious aspects with planets in both your sign and another fire sign, Sagittarius.

Because of this, you’re going to be faced with fresh, interesting new challenges that might require you to be on your toes more often. Friends may come to you with interesting puzzles for you to solve. Family may be looking to you for advice that will help a loved one out of a crisis.

If this sounds daunting, you will be glad to know that your inner strength and stamina will be up to the task. Also, your mental acuity will be able to cope with the smaller, more mundane stresses as if they weren’t even there. It could make you feel like a bit of a superhero, but even they have their limits. If you know when to pull back and allow yourself that precious “me” time, you should sail through 2014 with ease!

Virgo 2014 Horoscope (August 23 to September 22)

This year, two fire signs - Aries (clutching on to Uranus at the beginning of the year) and Leo (seizing Jupiter toward the end) – are acting as stimulants to help bring the best of you to the forefront.

A friend or acquaintance will be amazed at what a treasure trove of helpful information you are. At first, you may be dismissive because you’ll have so much on your plate you can barely think about yourself! But in the end, this could well be a channel for a new network of friends or acquaintances, thus opening up a new world for you! This is one of those times when just being yourself will pay off a hundredfold.

Besides your personal advancement, this also means a time when your communication with others is more open and honest. And for you, getting to know your family and friends better is going to open different doors within you. With Uranus in Aries, you’ll be looking at your companions in a different and much more positive light!

Libra 2014 Horoscope (September 23 to October 22)
Like a beautiful and intricate spider web, you’re going to feel connected with others via various strands of communication in 2014.

On January 21, the Moon enters Libra and creates a trine with the Sun that helps to enhance your interpersonal skills. People who might have looked past you in previous years are now looking at you, and finding a valuable human being.

On one hand, this is going to increase your personal network. On the other hand, you could find that people who need your skills will be coming to you more often. While you definitely like to help now and again, you’re going to have to learn to say no occasionally if it severely interferes with your life.

The best part is that your physical stamina will be stronger toward the end of the year, especially on September 24, when the Sun meets the Moon in Libra. You’re going to need that level of endurance, because you might have a lot to do for a while.

Toward the end of the year, you’re going to be getting out and doing things – even in inclement weather – just because you’re feeling really good about life!

Scorpio 2014 Horoscope (October 23 to November 21)

The Universe has plotted a way for you to reveal more of your inner self to your friends and family, but you’ll be getting something in return! From February 10 through February 12, the Moon in Cancer will be trine Saturn in Scorpio, meaning that difficulties within the home will be ironed out through the use of your own personal wisdom.

The level of familiarity you might have with friends, acquaintances, and neighbors might be equally unnerving and exhilarating. But don’t worry! You’ll be getting something out of it as well.

And with the Sun conjoining the Moon in Cancer, you’ll be able to retreat with no guilt when the outside world gets to be too much.

The important thing to remember is every bit of information you receive this year will helpful to you. Mostly this will involve how to handle or talk to difficult people, which will be worth a lot to you, both in your daily life and your career. Keep your eyes and ears open!

Sagittarius 2014 Horoscope (November 22 to December 21)

You’re hitting the ground running this year, considering Mars is in Libra and Uranus is in Aries, balancing out the staid effects of Capricorn. With the Moon entering Aries almost immediately (on January 6) you’re finding that chores aren’t back-breaking work but interesting puzzles that you’re bending over backward to solve.

Some of your more personal goals may take a while to achieve, but the path to solving them is strewn with solutions to questions you’d lost hope in answering.

Your personal energy level may slide a little in periods here and there in the summer, but you’ve got enough going so that friends can carry you during those low points.

The good news is that you actually gain a burst of energy with the advent of fall. Jupiter will also be in Leo from July 16 onward, giving your stamina a boost.

It all comes to a pleasant crux on December 1 with a Grand Fire Trine involving the Sun, Moon, and Mercury granting you a calm sense of reason to process all the information you’ve received all through the year. If you had a grand question to ask, you’ll have your grand answer before the year is up.

Capricorn 2014 Horoscope (December 22 to January 19)

The year begins with five planets in Capricorn – the Sun, the Moon, Mercury, Venus, and Pluto. This suggests that you will be very busy, but that doesn’t just apply to your job/work.

With Jupiter in Cancer most of the year and opposing planets in your sign at every turn, you may find yourself knee deep in home maintenance. And this doesn’t just mean upkeep of your physical residence. It also means keeping family and romantic ties strong with a certain amount of effort. The “work” required will often be pleasant, but if you’ve ever wanted a reason to avoid laziness, this is it.

Adding to the momentum – particularly later in the year – is Jupiter’s position in Leo starting in mid-July. Not only are you getting your second wind, but at last the work-to-results ratio is skewing in the favor of results.

What those results may be could surprise you, but they’re worth the continued effort at the same time. You’ll be seeing progress in interpersonal relationships, status, and emotional balance.

But why stop when things are getting good? When Mars in Sagittarius trines Jupiter in Leo on October 8, even retrograde Mercury can’t slow you down!

Aquarius 2014 Horoscope (January 20 to February 18)

You may not believe you have all the answers, but this year you’re going to have the right answers at the right time. If you go to others for advice, you may not be totally satisfied with what you’re hearing.

The Sun in your sign squares Saturn in Scorpio on February 11, while the Moon in Cancer opposes Venus in Capricorn. As a result, you’re going to feel as if your logic is flying in the face of what others call logic, and yet you’re still going to feel justified in your actions. You may have to be cautious in what you do early in the year, but you’re not going to be happy just bowing to the wishes of people around you, either.

As the year progresses you’re going to gain more encouragement for the more offbeat solutions you provide. Your friends may be amazed when advice you give (and they were skeptical about) works. Thus, if there’s something you want to do (within reason) that may not fall within conventional wisdom, don’t dismiss it.

With Saturn leaving secretive Scorpio and entering flighty Sagittarius on December 23, your elevated intuition could eventually pay off more than you expect.

Pisces 2014 Horoscope (February 19 to March 20)

Sometimes when people say the right thing, they’re not just cheering up the person who’s crying for help – they’re often helping themselves as well. On January 31 the Moon conjoins Mercury in Pisces, setting off a time period during which you have a lot to offer others.

Then when Mercury goes retrograde and lands in Aquarius on February 12, a friend could come back and reciprocate your help in some manner. Take advantage of it. One good turn always deserves another, and for you, “another” could be beneficial for the rest of the year!

One thing to remember is to pace yourself. Some people might be trying to take advantage of your good nature. With Mars and Saturn both in Scorpio in August, someone might not even be too subtle about using you. Keep your distance as best as you can, even if the devious person in question is the friend of someone you care about.

You won’t be of much help to anyone, least of all yourself, if you burn your candle at both ends with no promise of additional illumination.





5 Things for which You Should Thank your Ex



Breaking up is one of the most painful things that a person has to face in life. Letting go of all the moments, memories, love and hope is a task that you never want to accomplish. Yet, you have to go through the pain, forget whatever happened and move on. Considering a break up as the end of life isn’t really the right thing to do. In fact, it’s good that you don’t find yourself trapped in the chains any more. You should thank your ex for making you a better person, helping you to know what’s right for you and so many other things. So, let’s list out the 5 things for which you should thank your ex:

• For Bringing Out the “Lover” in you!
You were never this loving, were you? There must have been times when you were surprised at yourself for being so loving and caring. Well, you have been at your loving best, it was just for the wrong person. So, you are now introduced to the wonderful lover dormant inside you! You can now go on and spread the love and innocence among your friends and well wishers!
• For Teaching you the Difference Between Right and Wrong
You now know what you want to fight for. You know that you must argue for saving your self – respect, to prove your worth! You know what’s right in you and you don’t have to let anyone else tell you that it’s wrong. So whoa! You explored so much about you. Congratulations!

• For Making you Aware of what you want (and what you don’t!)
You now know that you don’t want to date a person who constantly brags about himself/herself. Your caution alarm starts ringing when you see a bragging bastard/bitch around. Also, now you know that you want to date someone who talks in a certain manner and behaves in a certain way and everything. You’ll change your path whenever someone of the category of your “dislikes” falls in it (basically, someone who’s like your ex). So yeah, now you have a clearer picture of what kind of person you don’t want to date, courtesy – your ex!

• For Showing you How it feels when your heart is broken!
You now know how it feels when someone breaks your heart! You know how awful it is, when someone rejects you or chooses someone else over you. That trauma, that pain – you’ve faced it all. You’ll be more careful while hurting someone. You’ll always try to make sure that you never break anyone’s heart. Because you know how it feels, you know it’s terrible!

• For Leaving You!
You must thank them to make you realize that you can live without them, that you have a life of your own, where you can live happily. You had always attributed your life to him/her, but now when they’ve left, you know that you have to love yourself, follow your dreams, cherish your own presence and live a happy life! They’ve imbibed ounces of confidence and strength in you. Go on, conquer the world because now you know what you’re worth!
I am falling short of words for the conclusion. I guess I’ve cheered up some heartbroken folks and made the stronger ones smile because they can relate. Keep smiling.


Do elephants remember


Here’s an interesting story! I don’t usually like these heartwarming stories,

 but this one is truly interesting … In 1987, Mkele Mbembe was on holiday

 in Kenya after graduating from Northwestern University. On a hike through

 the bush, he came across a young bull elephant standing with one leg raised in the air.

 The elephant seemed distressed, so Mbembe approached it very carefully.

 He got down on one knee and inspected the elephant’s foot and found a large

 piece of wood deeply embedded in it. As carefully and as gently as he could,

 Mbembe worked the wood out with his hunting knife, after which the elephant

 gingerly put down its foot. The elephant turned to face the man, and with

 a rather curious look on its face, stared at him for several tense moments.

 Mbembe stood frozen, thinking of nothing else but being trampled. Eventually

 the elephant trumpeted loudly, turned, and walked away. Mbembe never forgot

that elephant or the events of that day. Twenty years later, Mbembe was walking

through the Chicago Zoo with his teenage son. As they approached the elephant

 enclosure, one of the creatures turned and walked over to near where Mbembe

 and his son Tapu were standing. The large bull elephant stared at Mbembe,

 lifted its front foot off the ground, and then put it down. The elephant did

that several times then trumpeted loudly, all the while staring at the man.

 Remembering the encounter in 1987, Mbembe couldn’t help wondering

 if this was the same elephant. Mbembe summoned up his courage, climbed

over the railing and made his way into the enclosure. He walked right up to

 the elephant and stared back in wonder. The elephant trumpeted again,

 wrapped its trunk around one of Mbembe’s legs and slammed him

 against the railing, killing him instantly. Probably wasn’t the same elephant …


Little Johnny asking what do these words mean




Little Johnny comes home from school one day and asks his mother what “shit” meant.

Thinking fast she replied “food on the table”.

Next day he comes home and asks his mother what does “son of a bitch” mean.

Again, thinking fast again she says “It’s a priest”.

Next day he comes home and asks what does “fuckin’” mean. She says it means “getting dressed”.

That same night a priest was coming over for dinner. Johnny is just finished setting the table when he hears the doorbell ring.

He yells “got it”. He opens the door and says “Hey son of a bitch, shits on the table and mom and dad are upstairs fuckin’”.