Tom is cruising down the highway way over the speed limit. Cop pulls him over.
"Sorry officer, guess the speedometer got away from me. Happens every time I get hammered and try to drive home."
"What?! You're intoxicated?"
"Well I needed a stiff drink after I shot that guy! It's okay though, I managed to fit the body in the trunk."
"Sir, keep your hands where I can see them. Give me your license and registration right now."
"Well I would but it's in the glove box where I threw the gun, it's still pretty bloody and I don't want it to fall out until it's dried."
"Do. Not. Move. I'm calling for back-up."
Back-up gets there. Second officer gets out, and says
"Sir, please open your trunk."
Tom opens it. Clean as a whistle.
"Please show me your glove box."
Tom opens it. Clean as a whistle, along with his license and registration.
"I'll need you to take a breathalyzer."
Tom blows a .00
"Well what's going on? This officer said you had a dead body in the trunk, a bloody gun in the glove box and were drunk."
Tom says,
"Ha, I bet he said I was speeding, too."
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