A man was taking his old Mother to a home for old people. He wanted her to have the best one so he was investigating many of them. So one day he came to a home and the Head of the staff wanted to show him around. He asked his Mother to sit and wait in the entrance and the personal was going to watch over her while he was gone.
The old woman sat there for a while and then she suddenly started to lean over to the left side. A nurse hurried up to her, moved her up and placed a pillow at her left side. After a short while the old woman started to lean towards the right side. Of course the little nurse hurried to her and put her up in position, putting another pillow at her right side. Just a little while longer and the Mom now started to lean forward. She got propped up again by the nurse.
Now the son came back from his inspection. He had found that this home was absolutely the best he had seen. All rooms were very nicely furnished and there were skilled personal for the old ones. The price was also acceptable so he really thought that he found the right place for his Mom.
“Mom”, he said “I really think you will be happy here! What do you say?”
The Mother said: ” I do not want to stay here!” He was surprised and said: “But Mom – this is just the way you like it. You will be taken good care of here.”
The old Lady said really firmly: ” I will not stay here – they don´t allow me to fart!”
Adam’s Rib
Adam was walking around the Garden of Eden feeling very lonely, so God asked Adam, “What is wrong with you?”
Adam said, “Lord, I don’t have anyone to talk to.”
God said, “Then I will give you a companion, and she will be called a ‘woman’. This person will cook for you and wash your clothes, she will always agree with every decision you make. She will bear your children and never ask you to get up in the middle of the night to take care of them. She will not nag you, and will always be the first to admit she was wrong when you’ve had a disagreement. She will never have a headache, and will freely give ‘love’ and compassion whenever needed. She will never question your behaviour or the company you keep. She will support you and understand that you have important decisions to make throughout your life and don’t have time for nonsense…”
Adam asked God, “What will this woman cost?”
God said, “An arm and a leg…”
Adam said, “Take only my rib and reduce the quality of the woman ”
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